In my head.

When things doesn't turn out great, they say you can try again. Just keep trying and eventually it will turn out alright. I have always wondered, how strong can we actually be, to wait for "eventually"? We all know, patience and strengths has its limits and boundaries. Are we patient enough to wait for in the long-term benefits? Or maybe, being only a 19 years old, I am just an immature adult, who haven't reached the ultimate up to par standards of thinking.

Moving on.

Right now I currently am taking Economics foundation. For degree, I have no idea whatsoever to major in. Accounting is an axe above my head. Studying it is a migraine trigger. Doing it as a living? Whoaa, hold it right back over there. Personally, I wouldn't want to work as an accountant. See the long term effect okay. Accountants are always dealing with figures and digits and datelines = STRESS. Plus, when I get married * come on, it has to get to there at some point isn't it* I want to spend time with my family. And yes, I still want to work. Be it something light or something, I still want.

Someone told me, I will last only a month of working when I have a family of my own. I'd try not to. Yes, I want to spend as much time as I could with my child, but then again, I want to have a life of my own too. I want to have colleagues, I want to have that independent feeling. No, its not about the money. Its just something that I could feel attached too. And I've thought about it for a long while and decided. That when I have a family of my own, I want to be involved in something that has to do with writing. Be it a columnist or someone that writes articles in media or something. I don't want to spend my years of education to work only for a few years. Thats a final decision of mine, that's it and it's that.

Next up.

You know the feeling when you feel down, and you just need someone to be there with you and for you, but then it didn't turn out so well? I know that feeling. Its a feeling of you putting your hopes on someone but it crashed. You want to be taken care of but you're being let off. You want that someone to understand, or if he or she doesn't understand, pretends he or she does not asking questions that can irritate. You want that when you want to talk about it, he or she is there for you, no matter how the situations are..and not you can only talk about it at the right timing. I want that kind of someone. Where are you, someone.

the road to happiness